Words From The Master: 16 Dec 2007

Comparison, the green eyed monster!

We always compare ourselves with others. And more often than not we feel what others have, or have achieved, is more than what we have and start feeling jealous.

When we are not able to bear others’ excellence, we get jealous. Comparison is the seed and jealousy is the fruit.

We cannot deal with jealousy directly. Even if we tell ourselves repeatedly not to compare ourselves with others and not to feel jealous, we cannot overcome it. Even if we keep telling ourselves not to feel inferior because we are less wealthy than a neighbor, less handsome than a colleague, less intelligent than an acquaintance, we still feel inferior. And the jealousy that comes out of it is a very powerful emotion.

In reality, comparison does not have positive existence; it has negative existence. It only exists in our minds.

An object that has positive existence can be moved from one place to another place.
Let’s take the example of darkness. Can darkness be moved from one room to another? No! because it does not have a positive existence. But by bringing light into the room, it can be made to disappear.

Same way, comparison that has negative existence cannot be removed. But it can be made to overcome by bringing understanding and awareness into our minds.

Comparison results in low self-esteem or high self-esteem.

With low self-esteem, we attack other persons whom we are jealous of and we suppress ourselves. With high self-esteem, we try to suppress others if they do not support our active ego. This is the way seeds of violence and misery are sown in us.

We continuously run our life based on comparison. In consequence, we pick up the attitude of violence; we pull other people down; we learn methods to stop their progress. When we start to compare, it means we are picking up desires from other people. We try to work out others’ desires instead of living our own desires and trying to fulfill them.

We need to realize that each one of us is unique. God is an artist not a machinist. He sculpts each one of us with his own hands lovingly, uniquely. Therefore each one of us is different.

If this is understood clearly, there will be no scope for comparison. We will enjoy our own uniqueness and blossom with it, unparalleled in our own way.

Be blissful!

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This article was earlier published in the Economic Times, an Indian newspaper.