Words From The Master: 21 Oct 2007

Grow taller, don’t make your friend shorter!

For many celebrities 2006* is not ending too well. They are ending up in jails or worse.

What is interesting is the reaction of people to such exposures and judgments. Except for the few who are caught along with the culprits, others are happy. They are happy not because justice is being done, even if delayed. They are happy because some one else is in trouble.

It is as if we believe in a cosmic law that fixes a finite amount of trouble in this world, like fixing a finite space in hell. If someone else is in trouble, if a sufficiently large number of people is in trouble, then chances are, the probability is that I won’t be in trouble. This is the logic that works here.

Why are we happy when some one else is in trouble? Why are we troubled when some one is happy and successful? The simple answer may be jealousy, envy, the green eyed monster, that dictates that if you wish to be taller than some one else, then the simplest way is to cut the other person’s legs.

There is a more profound reason. From childhood we are brought up to believe in our deficiencies, more than our strengths. Those societies which pride themselves on building self esteem are the ones which have the largest number of depression cases.

Because we have no opinion of our own selves, we depend on other people’s opinions to feel happy. As an alternative, we feel happy, when some one else’s status is threatened, since in comparison ours is relatively better.

How can we get out of this rut? It is a natural law that happiness grows when it is shared and sorrow decreases when it is shared. Women have a greater propensity to benefit from this simple rule than men are. Men are ruled by their egos, women to a lesser extent.

Build up your self esteem. Learn to love yourself. There is nothing selfish about this. Unless you love yourself, you cannot love those dear to you. Unless you truly love your spouse, children and parents, you cannot love this world you live in.

When you wake up in the morning, when you are still in bed, touch yourself from head to toe, saying, I love my body, I am grateful to this Universe for having given me this wonderful body and mind. Do this for 21 days and see the difference. You will be transformed!

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This article was earlier published in the Economic Times, an Indian newspaper.
* What was true in year 2006, is true this year too!